Red Bull, Gives You Freedom
I will never understand girls who throw their bras at guys on stage those things are fucking expensive and he has no use for it like what do you want him to do pass it down to his first born daughter
I thought this was going to be slut-shaming but it’s glorious
Poor little guy looks like he’s saying
“You want me to leave? Okay…”
“You sure you want me to go? ‘cause I can stay…if you want…”
My optometrist fixed my glasses.
So I walked into the dentist this morning. My dentist asked me how my weekend was. I said “Good, I watched Captain America last night. I really liked it.” And my dentist says “Oh, my son is in that movie.” At first I thought he was joking but then I realized
Dr. Robert Evans
I looked it up
My dentist is Captain America’s dad
My doctor is JK Rowling’s husband.
JK Rowling’s husband has asked me if I am sexually active.